Who should YOU fight? Harry Potter edition

richieseddiekaspbrak:

Harry Potter: Very bad idea. Self-sacrificing as fuck and defeated the Dark Lord AS A BABY. You can’t fight a baby.

Ron Weasley: You probably could fight Ron bc he has insecurity issues you can easily exploit. You won’t feel good about winning though.

Hermione Granger: Do you have a death wish?? Don’t do it. Don’t try. Just… don’t.

Luna Lovegood: Doesn’t give two fucks. Will probably forget about the fight halfway through and start talking to you about Bramblehorns or something.

Ginny Weasley: If she doesn’t hit you over the head with a broom she’ll make literal BATS grow out of your FACE.

Draco Malfoy: You can totally win this fight. Bring up his dad for extra points.

Severus Snape: FIGHT SNAPE. He’ll be hard to beat but everyone wants you to. Literally everyone wants to kick his slimy ass. Fight him.

Molly Weasley: Do not be fooled by the knitted jumpers. She is the most deadly of all the Weasleys.

Albus Dumbledore: I mean it’s probably a bad idea. He’ll kill you without giving a fuck. Then seem all sad & apologise because The Greater Good. Before you know it your grandkids are named after him.

Rubeus Hagrid: WHY would you fight this man he has a HEART OF GOLD. Plus he’s a literal half-giant. Have tea with him instead.

Nymphadora Tonks: Nah. She’d probably transform into your mum or someone like that. You can’t fight your mum.

Sirius Black: Too awesome to fight, befriend instead.

Bellatrix Lestrange: I wouldn’t fucking attempt this. Unless you’re Molly Weasley. But lbr you’re probably not as tough as her.

Remus Lupin: Why would you want to fight Remus Lupin? WHY? What is wrong with you? Think about your life and choices to work out where you went wrong.

Dolores Umbridge: FIGHT HER. DESTROY HER.

Lord Voldemort: This might seem like a bad idea but remember how he couldn’t kill Harry as a baby? Or an eleven year old? Or a twelve year old? Yeah.