so i make an account on some garbage website. i dont wanna name an actual website so lets just make one up, lets call it tumblr dot com. and i open up the website, and i say “can i check my activity now please?” and they go “NO. IT CRASHES THE APP IF YOU TRY.” (spits) and i go “O-KAAAAY” and then i go to the bathroom. and i go “ANY UPDATES?” and they say “YEAH. WE DELETED YOUR BLOG WHILE YOU WERE IN THE BATHROOM. BECAUSE WE HATE YOU. NOW TAKE THIS VIDEO STREAMING SERVICE THAT NO ONE USES. GO, FETCH!” and i go OOOOOKAAAAAAAY and then i go to email tumblr support which is an oxymoron and i say “can i please make posts on the website” and they go “NO! IN FACT WERE GONNA FRAME YOU FOR MURDER! AND YOURE GONNA GO TO JAIL FOR THIRTY YEARS!” and i go “WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS!” and they say “BECAUSE WERE TUMBLR DOT COM AND LIFE IS A FUCKING NIGHTMARE!”

partybarackisinthehousetonight:

*pulls up to Sonic Drive-In* HEY *honks la cucuracha horn* YO DOES KNUCKLES WORK HERE

this is the best post on this entire godforsaken website and I want it on my dash as often as possible

Call And Beep Everyone You Know, Because There’s Gonna Be A Live-Action “Kim Possible” Movie

tcfkag:

buzzfeed:

Y’ALL!!!!

@alaric-greyson

rjwpshit:

I had an idea for D&D

shakespork:

regretrograde:

hate2breakittoya:

girls dont mature faster than boys, girls are punished from an early age for the same behaviour that boys are allowed to indulge in well into adulthood

i actually talked about this with a psych professor and she believes that women/young girls have been pushed into responsibility from young ages for so long that its actually triggered an evolutionary effect where young girls are literally developing mentally early in order to cope with the stress.

Local Girls Literally Evolve To Deal With Patriarchal Bullshit

dollopheadsandclotpoles:

bonnyanne:

Albus Severus Potter and the curse of the awful name.

“It is our names, Albus, that show which child our parents really hate, far more than our abilities”

I’m adding this one because it’s my favourite

yorripi:

prblms:

thomasthetalkingengine:

anus:

people who sleep with one pillow make me sick

people who sleep with more than one pillow are shown to be more lonely and depressed

reblog and put in the tags how many pillows you sleep with

cmder:

All millennials do is commit minor felonies and be gay

it’s han solo! he turned 2 on february 1st i love him even though he ran over my foot the second this picture was taken

a scaredy cat but also the most excitable creature i have ever met

really, when i named him han solo idk what i expected

i can’t just talk about one pet tho so here’s miss satan’s gremlin brother, asshole fluffbutt mcmeowface (also known as ‘buddy’)

he’s a butt but i love him anyway and also he’s the Friendly One out of all my pets. he’ll let you pet him until he gets bored and then he’ll try to eat your hand