”Talos the Mighty! Talos the unerring! Talos the unassailable! To you we give Praise! We are but maggots writhing in the filth of our own corruption! While you have ascended from the dung of mortality, and now walk among the stars! But you were once man! Aye! And as man you said, “Let me show you the power of Talos Stormcrown, born of the North, where my breath is long winter. I breathe now in royalty and reshape this land which is mine. I do this for you, Red Legions, for I love you.” Aye, love! Love! Even as man, great Talos cherished us. For he saw in us, in each of us, the future of Skyrim! The future of Tamriel! And there it is, friends! The ugly truth! We are the children of man! Talos is the true god of man! Ascended from flesh, to rule the realm of spirit! The very idea is inconceivable to our Elven overlords! Sharing the heavens with us? With man? Ha! They can barely tolerate our presence on earth! Today, they take away your faith. But what of tomorrow? What then? Do the elves take your homes? Your businesses? Your children? Your very lives? And what does the Empire do? Nothing! Nay, worse than nothing! The Imperial machine enforces the will of the Thalmor! Against its own people! So rise up! Rise up, children of the Empire! Rise up, Stormcloaks! Embrace the word of mighty Talos, he who is both man and Divine! For we are the children of man! And we shall inherit the heavens and earth! And we, not the Elves or their toadies, will rule Skyrim! Forever!”
“What’s with all the fucking gaijin in this area?” “Dude, don’t say that, use gaikokujin, it’s nicer.” “Oh, shit, right. What’s with all the fucking gaikokujin in this area?”
“The breaded pork cutlet bento box is like mega power. More than ramen. That’s accurate.”
all of them start dragging kiryu for his shitty cheap shirt for five minutes
“Shooting people sends a message.” “So does shooting anything.”
(after being told that massage parlors, mahjong, and hostess clubs were cut from the US version) “I feel sorry for the people who bought the American version. SEGA USA sucks.”
S: I don’t know any ex-yakuza running orphanages. K: There was one a few years ago. A good guy. M: You sure it wasn’t just a tax shelter? K: Sure it was a tax shelter but he ran it like a legitimate thing. You know.
“Author’s
note: A heated discussion takes place as to whether the game is
stereotyping the yakuza, which is resolved when Midoriyama, a
now-retired former mid-level faction boss,
points out
that the stereotypes about the yakuza are more or less correct, with the
exception of their alleged prowess in martial arts.“
im sorry to hijack this post like this but while we’re on topic i just recently discovered this game got a fully 3D remake and I think it’s in early access on steam but I can still barely believe it:
It just occurred to me that, out of the whole Smash Bros cast, the pair who probably have the most to talk about in terms of swapping war stories are Kirby and Bayonetta.
Please, expand on this point. My instinct is to believe you, but I’d like to hear your evidence.
Loves candy and playing dress-up
Constantly having their beauty sleep interrupted by seemingly minor annoyances that somehow escalate into universe-ending threats
Main problem-solving approach is to find the nearest eldritch abomination and punch it
Steps dogged by thematically similar frenemy who keeps finding excuses to duel them for the fate of the world (it’s getting a bit weird)
Just came out to have a good time and is honestly feeling so attacked right now
i cant believe i can justifiably say this but some of you might be too young to remember this meme
façade is a freeware game (which you can still download and play) that rose to internet fame around 2011-early 2012. it was an (imo) interesting concept where you played as a friend of a married couple visiting for the first time in years, using interactive text and game AI to either solve or help collapse their failing marriage. the graphics are extremely simple. the music is weird. the voice acting is pretty good.
it got to memetic quality pretty fast because of the….customizable nature of what you could say to them as well as the fact that trip (the husband) would forcibly remove you from the apartment and cause a game over if you said too many wrong things.
a big part of the meme was that if you said “melon” or “melons,” you’d almost always automatically be kicked out. this was bc the game always caught it as slang for tits regardless of context.
this shit feels like it was yesterday but it was almost an entire decade ago and im upset
facade is genuinely one of the only games that made me sincerely scared and upset (which is weird bc i dont even have experience w failing relationships) like i would probably classify it as the “best accidental horror game” ive played and i cant really explain why
i would like to see it done again tho now that we have better graphics and AI and shit
the weird thing about facade is that if you grew up in a household with parental conflict, for example, and you approach it in a similar way, it becomes really easy to win
but you can also just mess around, pick up that weird glass dildo thing and toss it across the room, kiss tripp and/or grace several times in a row, then type in any word you can think of for boobies and hilariously get kicked out while being named ‘gonzalo’ or ‘kha’ and that’s more fun
Just want to give you a quick fill-in on the status of the new update.
As you may know, I’ve always worked solo on Stardew Valley. However, for this multiplayer update I’ve had the help of Tom Coxon (of Chucklefish). He’s done all the network coding to turn Stardew Valley into a multiplayer game… truly an impressive feat, and one that would not be possible without his talent. He deserves a lot of credit for this — Thank you Tom!
Now, here’s where we’re at:
Work on the new features is done, and we’ve sent all the new text off to be translated into the different languages. Meanwhile, we are working on bug fixes. Once we’ve received the translated text and integrated it back into the game, we’ll begin a serious QA phase involving thorough testing of all new features in both multiplayer and single player contexts. When that is finished, the update should be ready for a public beta. I am still shooting for a spring release for the beta.
When the beta gets closer to launch, I’ll fill you guys in on more specifics as to how multiplayer will work, as well as a more complete list of the new features in the update.
I’ll also be sure to let you guys know as soon as we’ve determined a more concrete timetable for release.
ruby-dear archive 