We’re coming for you whether the Muggles like it or not, you can’t miss the World Cup, only Mum and Dad reckon it’s better if we pretend to ask their permission first. If they say yes, send Pig back with your answer pronto, and we’ll come and get you at five o’clock on Sunday. If they say no, send Pig back pronto and we’ll come and get you at five o’clock on Sunday anyway.
Never, ever doubt that Ronald Bilius Weasley is the best friend anyone could possibly wish for. (via braveremus)
k so now Fantastic Beasts is a movie will Tales of Beedle the Bard and Quidditch Through The Ages be one too?
I would honestly love to see a documentary-style production of Quidditch Through The Ages complete with expert interviews, dramatic reenactments, a couple grainy black and white videos, and maybe some medieval art of people on broomsticks.
watching trump slowly figure out what the presidency actually entails is a lot like what i imagine gilderoy lockhart looked like when the hogwarts teachers called his bluff and sent him into the chamber of secrets
sirius black getting so drunk one night that he transformed into padfoot and ate everything that dogs cannot eat and he wakes up the next day and he’s like whAT THE HELL DID I dO and he’s on edge for the next couple of days crying ‘am i going to die’
james has to remind him that he’s not really a dog but then remus is quiet for a second before going ‘but he ate it as a dog’ and they’re all like stumped for words until peter asks mcgonagall a ‘totally hypothetical’ question about eating things whilst in animagus form
I bet all the Hogwarts teachers get an unreal amount of “totally hypothetical” questions from students.
“Hey Slughorn wtf’s a horcrux? Just for laughs” -Voldemort
yknow the more jk rowlings world falls apart in america (race relations, international history, population, etc) the more i like to think that america just straight up doesnt have the statute of secrecy. european countries are falling over themselves hiding magic but come to georgia and theres a drunk redneck wizard wingardium leviosa-ing the shit out of a tractor to the delight of his drunk redneck muggle buddies in a walmart parking lot.
wizard on muggle violence is prevented by virtue of there being like a 50/50 chance that muggle is packing heat. muggle on wizard violence is prevented by knowing that wizard can give you boils spelling LIL BITCH on your forehead if you try to start something.
america is the weird redheaded stepchild of the magic world.
im not gonna stop reblogging this until this is the next Hot Fanon
english muggles come back to england and suspicious wizards meet them at the airport.
‘did you witness any strange or inexplicable acts while you were in america?’ they demand.
the english muggles just laugh in their dumb fucking faces. mate, it’s america.
what’s the difference between a werewolf and an animagus?
english wizard: *two hour lecture on legal history*
american wizard: six beers
@jumpingjacktrash congrats ive read hundreds of comments on this dumpster fire of a headcanon and yours is the best
You are a chef at Hogwarts and have just read the latest edition of “Fantastic Beasts and How To Find Them” when you come up with the idea to write your own book called “Fantastic Beasts and How to Cook Them”. What are some of your recipes?
when i was about 8 (bearing in mind deathly hallows was released when i was about 15) i wrote a harry potter fanfiction where harry and ginny where married and it was the morning of the september 1st and they were taking their 3 kids to the platform to meet ron, hermione, and their kids. i dont remember what the weasley kids were called, but i do remember that harrys kids were called lily, james, and for some reason mercury bob. i dont know why mercury bob, but i do know its still less stupid than albus severus.
When you watch Fantastic Beasts, you realize and remember that the Harry Potter series was set in a school of wizards and witches who are still learning magic.
ruby-dear archive 