Whenever Hagrid finally decides to retire as Care of Magical Creatures professor you can bet your last knut that Charlie Weasley flies back to England the following week excitedly waving his resume and recommendation letters from no less than two Scamanders and the Minister of Magic, Hermione Granger.
I’m pretty sure he would also have recommendation letters from Rubeus Hagrid, the retiring professor, Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived and a very confusing one from Puddlemere United player, Oliver Wood, saying that he was one of the best Seekers he had ever seen.
Not to mention the fact that he flies back to England not on a broomstick or any other normal form of transportation, but landing on the Hogwarts grounds on the back of the largest dragon anyone has ever seen.
Reblogging again for that last addition.
Charlie: *glides in on a dragon* HELLO HIRE ME
Everyone: What the fuck
Ron: (in the background, mortified) this is normal
Tag: harry potter
honestly the harry potter fandom is so wild like we’ve all collectively refused to accept cursed child as canon but some college kids tell us hufflepuffs are particularly good finders and we don’t even question it
I didn’t truly get the whole “death of the author” paradigm until I watched the harry potter fandom collectively divorce JKR
#also it’s not just cursed child#it’s also all the slytherin kids branded evil#it’s about ending a series with babies ever after#writing an epilogue designed for baby boomers in a series aimed at millennials#it’s harry naming his kid after two abusers#it’s about claiming dumbledore is gay for Diversity Points#but in a movie series featuring his life#and featuring the one he loved#there won’t be a trace of it#it’s about casting an abuser then making excuses for it#when hp is the story of an abuse survivor#it’s about everything to do with the american magical community#from cultural appropriation to the sheer pain of the term ‘no maj’#sorry rowling#you started us off#but now#our city now
OMG
DEAD
OH JESUS FUCK
I CAN’T. I’M DEAD I’VE DIED I’M DEAD.
I HAVE LOST ALL MY SHIT AND CANNOT HOPE TO FIND IT AGAIN.
VOLDYHORSE
I can’t not reblog.
Break a prop? Just put it back and walk away… ha ha!!
Emma’s reaction though
Sometimes it freaks me out how much like their characters they are. Emma’s very concerned, Dan saves the day, Rupert laughs.
I’m never not reblogging this. They’re just so damn cute…
the three most iconic harry potter quotes
- “WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING YOU MOTHERFUKERS!” It was…………………………………………………Dumbledore!
- I’M IN A RAGE! THIS IS THE ANGRIEST I’VE EVER BEEN!
- What is that mysterious ticking noise?
I was Harry Potter, my friend Alex was Ron, and my friend Angelica was Hermione and it was the Ministry of Magic scene from the Deathly Hallows part 1. We had just dealt with Umbridge and the potion wore off. I didn’t know how to apparate so I just walked to the elevator and out like, this arcade where Snape was at the door, and into this mall. My friends saw me and were like, “Hey.”
“Hey, Snape saw me.”
“Oh no, what are we going to do?”
“What the Hell is he going to do? Call Voldemort? Voldemort come to Yankee Candle we found the boy who fucking lived.”
And Voldemort appeared and I was like, “Hey Voldemort, how’s this candle smell…Oh wait, you ain’t got no nose bitch.”
And he started crying and went to Hot Topic while Alex and Angelica laughed.
Quote of the day: “Voldemort come to Yankee Candle we found the boy who fucking lived.“
Who should YOU fight? Harry Potter edition
Harry Potter: Very bad idea. Self-sacrificing as fuck and defeated the Dark Lord AS A BABY. You can’t fight a baby.
Ron Weasley: You probably could fight Ron bc he has insecurity issues you can easily exploit. You won’t feel good about winning though.
Hermione Granger: Do you have a death wish?? Don’t do it. Don’t try. Just… don’t.
Luna Lovegood: Doesn’t give two fucks. Will probably forget about the fight halfway through and start talking to you about Bramblehorns or something.
Ginny Weasley: If she doesn’t hit you over the head with a broom she’ll make literal BATS grow out of your FACE.
Draco Malfoy: You can totally win this fight. Bring up his dad for extra points.
Severus Snape: FIGHT SNAPE. He’ll be hard to beat but everyone wants you to. Literally everyone wants to kick his slimy ass. Fight him.
Molly Weasley: Do not be fooled by the knitted jumpers. She is the most deadly of all the Weasleys.
Albus Dumbledore: I mean it’s probably a bad idea. He’ll kill you without giving a fuck. Then seem all sad & apologise because The Greater Good. Before you know it your grandkids are named after him.
Rubeus Hagrid: WHY would you fight this man he has a HEART OF GOLD. Plus he’s a literal half-giant. Have tea with him instead.
Nymphadora Tonks: Nah. She’d probably transform into your mum or someone like that. You can’t fight your mum.
Sirius Black: Too awesome to fight, befriend instead.
Bellatrix Lestrange: I wouldn’t fucking attempt this. Unless you’re Molly Weasley. But lbr you’re probably not as tough as her.
Remus Lupin: Why would you want to fight Remus Lupin? WHY? What is wrong with you? Think about your life and choices to work out where you went wrong.
Dolores Umbridge: FIGHT HER. DESTROY HER.
Lord Voldemort: This might seem like a bad idea but remember how he couldn’t kill Harry as a baby? Or an eleven year old? Or a twelve year old? Yeah.
what’s the most disturbing HP fanfiction you’ve ever read?
The cursed child
the wonderful thing about weasleys
is weasleys are wonderful things
“Fantastic Beasts and Where To Find Them” buddy I already know where to find them; apparently it is literally anywhere on Hogwarts grounds because so far I’ve seen a three-headed dog, a basilisk, a bunch of acromantulas, four dragons – five if you count Norbert! – a giant squid, hundreds of dementors, a herd of thestrals, and worst of all, Dolores fucking Umbridge
ruby-dear archive 